the holidays have finally dawned upon us.. those sweet sensations of sleeping late and waking up just as late returns for us to savor it all.. most importantly i can finally take my mind off so many things.. and juz hang out with those i can truly associate with.. the once familiar laughter fills the air once more and i find myself cracking jokes more often now.. a complete step aside from the mundane life i am living during class time.. not that i can't click with em.. juz that things happened along the way which hurt me and caused me to withdraw.. that aside.. promos is coming.. biology is done.. chem is almost done and will be as of tml.. revision on math and econs will be on the way as of wednesday that taking i am to stick and follow the schedule i planned for myself..
i have found many who i can stdy with over the holidays.. people who are more than glad to go out and study.. and most importantly reward ourselves with food after the long day.. they share the same sense of humour.. and always never take it to heart when being the butt of the jokes.. even if it meant being racist.. i admire the tolerance level, something which i have but always seemed to be exploited tinking that they can make fun of me but not vice versa.. that really sucks.. probably where things started to plunge.. but who am i to judge really.. the reason cant be that shallow.. there's gotta be something much deeper than i tink.. i muz evaluate and find out what that really is.. since they refuse to let out a hint to what it is..
but really.. such things can wait.. this aint really top priority.. what is is the preparation for the all important and dreaded promos..

i had fun with the 103ppl today.. going over to varun's place and chilling there.. playing pool, Halo, singing songs with the guitar to accompany.. it was pure fun.. but the thing about the pool table was that its meant for snooker.. meaning the pockets have rounded sides and not angular like those at shops.. so we cant simply just aim straight but rather use just the appropriate strength to ensure the ball dosen bounce out.. it happened to me so many a times.. sigh.. o well.. even playing Halo was hard to adapt.. the console was Xbox.. and not 360.. so the interface of the controller was different and had to do some getting use to.. so many a times i threw a grenade by mistake.. meleeing instead of crouching[ok maybe this is due to too much call of duty]..
we had dinner at simpang bedok juz now.. i tink we were really that hungry cuz we literally juz called any random dishes and juz ate it all! i had to order seperately though as i had to monitor my cash.. running low on it.. sigh.. but the thosai and paper prata was in bar enough.. super filling and too sweet man.. to top it up, bandung was exceptionally sweet.. too much syrup i tink.. lol..

how i wish i could stay in this wonderland for eternity.. reliving the same day over and over.. not having to tink of what's happening back in reality..
but i guess i cant.. this is life.. i choose this path.. and i really tink i made a wrong choice in sub combi and not applying for 4H2 PCME.. could have been with u guys and simply crap all day and night long! life is cruel.. always is and forever will be.. i just gotta face it and overcome it.. every obstacle i face which does not put me down, only makes me stronger in mind and any other aspect..
God be with me through this tormenting time and help me go through this as u have been with me these past term.. helping me along the way and slowly build the way back to what it was.. maybe not as good, i never expect that.. but even half of what it was.. is good enough.. i cant stand this anymore.. the thought of going through it without any friends to take my mind off it or to share it with.. is just unimaginable.. i know u'll be with me.. in spirit and mind.. as i walk this path, not alone but together with you, the road may be long, the valley so deep and the ocean so wide, but i know u'll be there to make it all possible for in you i can do all things and accomplish the impossible! thank you lord!

(9:36 PM)