woken up by my alarm.. i lazily stretched my heavy arm to silence the shrilly ringing.. i laid there, eyes open staring into nothing else but eternal darkness.. it was 5.30am in the morning and i am the first to gain consiousness on this lazy monday.. getting ready for school so early in the day seemed like a long-lost routine having not done so for the past 30days or so.. i stood by my window.. overlooking the park illuminated by orange light.. i prayed asking God to allow me to get on better terms with my friends, to help me change the outlook i have on them, to make the message given by brother kenny a reality for i sincerely want to change..
true enough God helped me through the day with no conflicts whatsoever not even suffering from the usual monday blues as i sat at my seat listening to the lessons ever so attentively.. guess my will to change really has started to shown.. putting that aside..
it truly is amazing how fast time passes.. in a blink of an eye the june holidays were gone ,swallowed by the devious jaws of time, mostly taken away by june lessons which lasted through the first 3 weeks of the holidays.. i managed to re-access myself as i reflected myself with the pastor's message whom which is the last i will hear till the end of my O levels or hopefully after prelims i will return if i score substantially: below 15...
the spec course has pass with my 03s all graduating as specialists 5 of whom has attained the coveted rank of 2SG.. though significantly lower in numbers compared to my batch.. i am nevertheless proud of them for rank is what you wear, respect is what you earn.. how true is that.. with NCC day coming this friday and SYF this sat which DMN NCC air will be marching in for the first time in our history.. definitely the first of many times to come.. my unit has certainly soared to higher heights but most of the weight rests on my successor Syafiq who is now in charge of my former department as Aero Head.. do our unit proud in this year's Air Competition once more..promise me that.. for that is the challenge is put forth to you..

well.. of cuz i did managed to take a beautiful shot of our transport system.. one which we see almost everyday..



Yes.. it is none other than the traffic light button.. hahaz.. nice shot aint it.. cant believe i took it myself.. =P

(10:47 PM)

walking around town yesterday with my friends after watching Silent Hill once more.. yes i watched that movie again cuz they agreed to treat me. i didn't get caught and actually sneaked past the guard with ease.. there i was sitting right in the middle of my friends having to endure the complicated storyline, amazed once more at the gore and violence of the movie.. believe me.. there is no scare factor at all.. probably that was why it was rated 2/5 stars by critics.. haiz..

anyways.. was walking with my friends till i saw a girl with her group of friends walking up to me.. i fixed my eyes upon her and began to scrutinize her.. she seemed extremely farmiliar.. somewhere in my 15years walking upon this Earth i have seen her before maybe even befriended her once.. but i cant seem to recall the slightest memory abt her.. it seems to be locked deep within my brain, refusing to be tapped.
she came up to me and waved like any girl would.. she was rather ravishing, her dyed brown hair cascaded down to her shoulder, her face a nice oval, etc.. u get the point..

she gave me a curious stare..

long-lost friend: " you're.. Kenneth right?"
me: "yes i am.. but i do not seem to recall your name.. have we met before somewhere?"
long-lost friend: with a slightly angry look.. " u mean u forgotten me? "
me: " i am terribly sorry, but it seems that my brain's archives seems to be having some difficulties" [yea right i thought]
long-lost friend: she giggled a while " i sat beside you once remember? "
me: thinking very hard now..
long-lost friend: " don't remember eh? " she tells me her name
me: "Oh!! well HI"
long-lost friend: smiling " HI!! "

everything seem to come back to me at that instant.. every single memory i had of her suddenly became crystal clear at the mention of that name.. it truly is amazing how knowing so many people can cause u to forget some whom u have not met in a while.. haiz.. the funny part is.. when i looked around.. our friends were a distance away from where we were standing chatting away with their new found friends.. jeez... those guys.. how childish can they get..
apparently.. she already has a boyfriend so you people reading this entry can erase that thought of yours now!!

(6:00 PM)

staring out of the window of the bus.. my eyes caught something so very inspiring to all..
one would normally not care about a bunch of youths playing football at an open space in between HDB flats.. but this one was exceptional. other than the fact is saw a mixture of races playing happily together.. which is well.. a proven fact that racial harmony has been effectively promoted by the Singapore government..
putting that aside.. what so inspiring is that i saw a young malay.. probably abt 17years old of age.. holding metallic "sticks" to support himself as he staggered round the play area.. that really caught my unmost attention as my eyes were fixed upon him as i started to scrutinize him.. i gaped.. he was limping around with only one leg.. the other was most likely amputated for some reason.. maybe due to a disease or an accident.. that person alone.. made me get off the bus a stop earlier just to watch him play.. it simply amazes me at what he can do even with that disability..

he may be disabled but he definitely not unable

just by looking how he kicks the ball with sheer percision. the way he positions himself in the play area.. it sometimes makes u wonder whether he really is disabled to begin with.. by fact he is. some say reality is harsh but in this case.. i can say that he has taken that fact and turned it around. not allowing it to bother him in any way.. the way people looks at him differs from those who are not willing to do something about their life but sit down in the underpass of orchard road and beg for money.. hoping some kind souls will donate money to allow him to get pass his day with the bare necessities or at least let him buy the food he needs to survive.

the new show on CH5.. Life story which debuts sometime this week.. should really consider putting this guy into their show.. showcasing him to Singapore and allow those disabled to know that they can do something with their life.. utilizing what is left of their humaniod body.. without arms.. so what? they are those who have learnt to write with their mouth, ear, leg, etc.. paint with their mouth.. those without a leg, or both.. u still have your arms.. u are still useful to society in a way that u can still be productive in factories or desk-bound work like administration if u have the skills..

hey thanks N-102 and other CG for the lovely Ice-cream party we had today for fellowship!! =P

(9:32 PM)

12th june..
Lazily woke up and dragged my body out of my comfortable bed.. knowing that i would be deprived of it for the next 2 nights where i have to settle for the "comfort" of my undersized sleeping bag. i did the final checks of my bagpack and stared at my sleeping bag.. contained within a neon blue cover.. no longer than 50cm and approximately as round as a 1.5litre bottle.. it sometimes hits me why am i still using the same sleeping bag for the past 5years... i have since grown an outstanding 35cm since primary 6... from a short 142cm to a towering 177cm as of today.. nevertheless.. i bid farewell to my parents and bro.. waving them goodbye. i turned immediately after seeing my parents responding, not caring about whether my bro made an attempt to even lift his hand for that is his character..
hoped on a cab and rode off to Dunman NCC Air Part A and B Camp 2006.. the last camp for me as a specialists for the unit before i officially step down in August. i am sure many of u must be thinking why in the world am i still caring abt the unit though i have stepped down earlier in april.. and that i may be so free to actually attend a camp.. well.. the answer is simple really.. i just felt i needed to be at the camp.. and being sec4 and a candidate for the GCE O levels examinations this year, i am not spared from the onslaught of lessons the school has lined up for us during the june holidays. so did i go for the lessons? r u nuts?! of cuz i went.. who in the RIGHT state of mine wouldn't? o wait.. idiots who dun seem to care abt their academic results and future.. i am not sure who they are as i dun really even care to notice who is absent.. why should i care anyways.. ok.. moving on..
had a fantastic night that day.. 3laptops and a CPU= LAN network.. yup.. we created our very own LAN in the dance studio where we the sec4/5 and CLTs accomodated during the camp.. we practically did not sleep much for we had way too much fun.. playing "lame" games.. doing ever "lamer" forfeits.. DOTA.. Generals.. Dawn Of War.. etc..

13June
woke up extremely late today.. but i dun think anyone seemed to care that we had only 60min before lessons starts when we rose up from our sleepy slumber.. despite the facts.. we headed to Mr Prata where we had breakfast for we will not resent ourselves to the pathetic breakfast of bread which the camp has prepared for us.. well i mean.. we are those who have stepped down and are here only to ensure nothing screws up.. so ultimately.. we can choose whether we want the food or not..lol.. well.. eating at Mr Prata would definitely cause some of us to be late esp those from 4B ,4E and 4F whom had lessons at 8.. me and tk resigned back to the dance studio where we occupied ourselves till 10.30 when our lesson starts..
well.. today was rather the opposite of yesterday.. that 3 of us [ yh, faiz and me ] decided to play Basketball instead staring at a computer screen and waste our lives away..[ jk ]..
campfire loomed before us.. and we managed to build one ourselves!! no help from SCOUTS!! whom this year seemed uncooperative to an extent but putting that aside.. the campfire was a success overall..

14June
lessons came and went.. the camp finally came to a conclusion and all fears of the 03s not having the leadership qualities we are looking all were put to rest after seeing the outstanding display during the camp.. esp from Syafiq whom i think would be taking over me as Aero Head of Dmn Air unit..
yu heng, ponk, prab and myself hoped onto a cab and rode home.. where i simply just knocked out on my bed.. =P.



CLT Aqil.. artistic seh.. lol


Result of Boredom at night..[ dance studio ]




puttin it all together now.. [ construction of campfire ]



heng posing with extreme long Firewood



candid shot of me in dance studio spectating comp users



Dunman AIr

(9:26 PM)

something just seem to make me reminisce the past.. im not exactly sure what.. but mainly i thought abt the past 2 years.. the 2 years that would unltimately decide my fate during the Os this year..
have i always been a "jerk"? i mean standing to my principles.. my morals... is it wrong to stand by them? so wrong to the extent that i have to endure the torment and mockery from the "victims".. is it wrong? wrong to "pao tou" those who im sure knew what they were doing was wrong.. those who are just bent on breakin the rules probably living by the motto rules are meant to be broken? what is it that has made a change in most ppl i know.. and i mean for the worst.. i remember a person who once brought me back to the faith.. emphasizing on the moral conducts of christians but all i see of him now is scraps of that person.. what is it that caused this change? my sec 3 class was not as noisy as it is today.. we were constantly reprimanded cuz of our poor performance.. now we are cuz we are simply too noisy..and noisy cuz of a selected group of ppl. does it make any sense? i dont get it..
den again.. what has caused the change in me? what caused me to bring out what i believe in so strongly this year? have i been hardened by the harsh reality of life? has my heart formed a protective layer to fend off any insults which i take almost like a weekly affair? have i become more introvert to an extent? i am not sure.. but one thing i can be sure of is that the driving force behind me will never forsake me..
my friends whom i have known since sec1 seem to be the most understanding of those i have known.. im not sure as to why.. but does it matter? but it truly is disheartening to see your friends torn between each other over petty reasons.. no names here..
i really do not wish to dwell on this any longer.. furthermore.. i have to prepare for the BBQ i am hosting for my IMCB friends.. yup.. we are having a reunion after a short 5months.. =P.. better still.. its held at my place.. o yea!!

(3:52 PM)

Emerge 2006 a production of CITY HARVEST CHURCH!! CHC... i could tell my absense was dearly missed by my cell group members.. they welcomed me back to warmly.. and made my hair a rainbow.. lol.. yea they used hair sprays all for me.. lol.. lets see.. my hair turned from its normal jet black to an array of gold red pink and green.. lol..
going back into the house of God truly is a wonderful feeling.. more meaningful to see that so many non-christians are gathered there that night for the annual Emerge conference.. somehow i could feel a stronger aura of faith around me.. the songs had more vibrancy and pastor kong is.. well as funky as ever.. =P.. i've missed so much when i was away from church and i deeply regret that.. unfortunately my presense will be short.. the end of the june holiday would mark the last session of service before my parents barr me from going again as they found my results unsatisfactory.. despite the fact i jumped 35+ in level poistions back to 78 from last year end of year exams.. haiz.. but its ok i guess.. its only for this year.. i hope..
i know its a short post.. but i have been extremely bz lately.. and dun tink that my holidays is very free hor.. lol.. i wont have a life till the last week.. so juz infer from that sentence..

(10:43 AM)