A Look Into My Inner Self
Friday, November 24, 2006
someone got me thinking.. are things really what they are right now? are those whom i had alleviated our ill feelings really not hate me anymore? what was or is it that caused them to hate me in the first place.. thats what made me ponder.. self reflect on my personality.. which might have been the root of all my problems in my FORMER secondary school..
i admit i am proud and hurting my pride would be a huge blow towards me probably the reason why i have constructed a barrier against comments which might have an effect on it.. even the slightest of it.. hence.. the heck-care attitude i give towards negative comments. BUT that does not mean i do not make a concerted attempt to change the way i am.. all too rarely i have heard people telling me straight in the face what is it about me that seriously needs some changing.. people have attacked me with countless numbers of methods.. including virtually which i fervently defended myself against the waves of insults.. never once had these group ever told me the reason why they attacked me.. other than once it had something related to an entry on my blog.. period.
i shall take a neutral stand here.. no offence to anyone.. these people claimed to have forgiven me for what they assert i have done wrong.. of which i had absolutely no idea what it was [reason why it took so long for the matter to be resolved]. this can be pictured as an old lock which people try to unlock.. cursing at how old and vintage the lock is, hoping against hope that it will unlock itself without the key and so they might enter and change what lies within.. similar to that of the picture to the right which i took just a few days back..[ yes i haven been fiddling with my lumix camera again ]
long story cut short.. i juz hope people would tell me straight in the face what is it they do not like about my personality.. and appreciated if they told me how i could improve on it.. of cuz if they came and told me nonsensical stuff like about my physical features then they are simply asking for trouble for i am practically immune to those comments since primary school.. nothing u say about it would daunt me, break me much less demoralize or take me off guard..
i simply hope i can enter MJC for PAE now..
(8:35 AM)
i shall take a neutral stand here.. no offence to anyone.. these people claimed to have forgiven me for what they assert i have done wrong.. of which i had absolutely no idea what it was [reason why it took so long for the matter to be resolved]. this can be pictured as an old lock which people try to unlock.. cursing at how old and vintage the lock is, hoping against hope that it will unlock itself without the key and so they might enter and change what lies within.. similar to that of the picture to the right which i took just a few days back..[ yes i haven been fiddling with my lumix camera again ]