i lost my cool.. i totally lost it all in front of my cousins..
i was attempting a math sum and frustrated when try after try i get the wrong answer.. my little cousins started making irritating voices which i could tolerate if i was in control of myself.. the frustration i felt within me simply needed to come out.. i said diam in a firm tone initially but they persisted.. i, finally lost it and shouted at them.. my mother was stun, cousins, aunts, grandparents.. everyone. they knowing me as a cool headed guy who rarely or never did show anger, seeing me unleashing the rage within me. i suppose it was incomprehendable for them.. my mother soon took me home where she knew i would be able to concentrate a lot better.
in the car.. i related the incident to one of my friend, she too was taken aback stating it in her reply to me.. u concluded that i was too tense and thats where the prob started.. that i should probably take a break for an hour or 2 before continuing.
too tense.. is it the stress? the fact that im pushing myself to the limit in order to achieve my target of 9points for Os? maybe it was..but who can blame me.. Os is just round the corner with the written paper starting in less than a month.. how can one not be stressed? come to think of it.. since i knew this. why did i agree to go down to my grand parents house? o yea.. it was to celeb my aunt's bdae.. sigh.. reality can be so harsh sometimes..
i just sincerely hope that this wont happen again.. it isnt exactly me at the moment in time.. a spur of the moment maybe? lord help me..

(2:37 PM)